Why ‘Post’ and ‘Lost’ Should Rhyme…

What a good son, brother and grandson I thought I was being. My first Christmas living overseas and I had bought, wrapped up and packaged a parcel full of gifts for my family at Christmas. I had even gotten myself down the Post Shop to post it in time for it to arrive in the UK for Christmas!

Never mind that it was a blazing hot day and I could feel the chocolate bar in the package had gone soft. It would soon be sat in the freezing hold of an Airmail plane and would be restored to its former glory. I was definitely doing the right thing by sending these presents – wasn’t I?

Well, 25th December passed and my family still had not received their pressies! In fact, most of January passed. Sorry, all of January. And February. Their parcel was lost. Or stolen, more like. Everyone’s innocent until proven guilty, but it seems that the temptation of three NZ calendars, a DVD and a bar of New Zealand’s finest choc is a wee bit too much of a temptation for some postal workers. “How did they know what was in the package?” you ask. Because it was written on the side of the flipping envelope! On the customs slip. Next time I reckon I’ll just write ‘1/4 litre of urine, some fingernail clippings and last week’s TV guide’ on that thing.

Of course, there is the possibility that the parcel was genuinely lost by some honest accidental method. Such as ‘it fell out the back of the plane’. Or maybe a sniffer dog raided it at the airport, just before the poor creature found out what chocolate does to dogs? Or, at a push, the melted chocolate looked too much like a stool on the x-ray scanner to allow it entry into the UK?

None of it matters, really. The main point is that my family are still awaiting their Christmas bundle of joy and it’s 13th March. And that makes me quite sad, really.

Post a Present

A Week Spent Watching Outrageous Fortune Episodes…

And here ends another week, our fifth week, as honorary ‘Westies’. The weather has been a bit up and down this week. One evening we managed a trip to Bethells Beach for a take away dinner, the rest of the week’s evenings have been spent at home, watching loads and loads of Outrageous Fortune Episodes.

Being relatively new to NZ and Jen having been in the UK for 6 years, neither of us had had the pleasure of Outrageous Fortune, until recently we were in The Warehouse and couldn’t resist handing over the $19 they were asking for Season 1. The gamble was what you might call: “WELL WORTH IT!” as, despite receiving mixed reviews amongst colleagues, we both love it.

Watching the continuous stream of troubles arriving at the door of the Wests has highlighted to me a unique way of living, which I am a strong follower of. There is no name for such ways, so I’ll simply call it ‘Watching Old TV Shows Way After They Were On The TV The First Time’. Without meaning to, I’ve always done it.

Back in the UK, I used to enjoy re-running Dragon’s Den episodes, a few years after they were first run. About 99% of South Park episodes are brand new to me; I own two whole Simpsons DVDs, of which I have seen two episodes; I love Black Books, have three seasons of it, but have only seen one; And Spaced, one of my favourite all time TV comedies, was only first watched by me in 2003 (it came out in 1999).

I have given some thought as to why I am so far behind the times and I have put it down to a couple of factors: the first was that I packed of to Uni in September 1999 and the TV reception was never close to great, so I never saw a lot of these shows first time round. The second reason is a kind of subconscious future-proofing: I am obviously scared that TV is going to suffer some massive ‘creative downturn’ (hell, some would argue it already has – eh Simon?) so am saving up as many episodes of quality programming as possible. Just in case.

I still have about four seasons worth of Outrageous Fortune episodes to work my way through, then I may just begin on Lost. Actually, I may go back and fill in my X-Files gaps first… We’ll see.

The Groove Armada CD Is No More…

…The future is beginning. If you’re reading this, the chances are you have downloaded music before. The chances are you know all about the battles the recording industry has been fighting with the internet service providers over illegal music downloads. So here’s a novel solution: allow a free music download, but market the crap out of a kind of complementary product at the same time!

In this case the product is Bacardi and the site is called BliveShare. Good on them for being up there amongst the first to try such a thing. The deal is simple: Rather than try and sell you a Groove Armada CD, the record company has agreed to give you their new EP, free (that’s FREE!) with no legal implications, provided you get it from this site and then you share the site with your mates. Sweet.


This is 100% genuine. The downloads come down at 320kbps, which is just about as good as a Groove Armada CD, only FREE!